A Man Worth Marrying

One month ago today, Ruth Bell Graham, passed away. When Ruth Bell was a teenager, she was sent from her childhood home in China to a school in Korea. At the time, she fully intended to follow in her parents’ footsteps and become a missionary. She envisioned herself a confirmed “old maid” ministering to the people of Tibet. While at school, however, Ruth did give some serious thought to the kind of husband that she might consider. As she tells in her book A Time for Remembering, she listed these particulars:

“If I marry: He must be so tall that when he is on his knees, as one has said, he reaches all the way to heaven. His shoulders must be broad enough to smile, firm enough to say no, and tender enough to kiss. Love must be so deep that it takes its stand in Christ and so wide that it takes the whole lost world in. He must be active enough to save souls. He must be big enough to be gentle and great enough to be thoughtful. His arms must be strong enough to carry a little child.”

Ruth Bell never did become a full-time missionary in Tibet. However, she did find a man worth marrying: the Evangelist Billy Graham. As his wife, Ruth Bell Graham became a missionary to the whole world!

To all of you single girlfriends, let’s pray that God will lead to us a man worth marrying. A man who is comfortable on his knees in prayer is a man you will feel comfortable standing beside as He serves Jesus and His children. He is a man worthy of your love and respect. I am committed to wait for a man who has made this verse his life motto:

“Whom have I in heaven but you [the Lord]? And besides you, I desire nothing on earth.” Psalm 73:25

A man worth marrying:

1. Puts the needs of others ahead of his own. He accepts people and is committed to loving them even when his love is not returned. Philippians 2:3-4, “Do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.”
2. Rejoices in his relationship with Christ. His joy in the Lord is evident in his life. John 15:11, “that your joy may be made full.”
3. Maintains proper relationships. He seeks a good relationship with everyone -- friends, parents, siblings, co-workers. Hebrews 12:14, “Pursue peace with all men.”
4. Refuses to jump ahead of God’s timing. He chooses against impulsiveness so he may always be in the exact center of God’s will. Psalm 37:7, “Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him.”
5. Seeks to meet the practical needs of others. He is not self-absorbed. He is moved with compassion to serve those in need. Ephesians 4:32, “Be kind to one another; tender-hearted.”
6. Stands for what is right. He is known as a man of integrity. Genesis 39:9, “How then can I do this great wickedness, and sin against God?”
7. Follows through on his God-given responsibilities. Recognizes that when his God-given talents are combined with Jesus, he is adequate for any task. He is therefore neither overconfident nor insecure as he approaches it. He is diligent, dependable, and stays with a difficult task until it is completed. 1 Corinthians 4:2 NIV, “Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful.”
8. Understands the importance of feelings and emotions. He takes the initiative to lead but tempers it with gentle responses toward the feelings of others. Colossians 3:12, “So as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”
9. Flees temptations to compromise. He refuses to be in situations that are sensual, immoral, or impure. He avoids strife and jealousy. He does not allow a temper to control him or anger to destroy him. Proverbs 25:28, “Like a city that is broken into and without walls is a man who has no control over his spirit.”

The man you consider may not have all these qualities perfected. He may be at differing levels of maturity, but there will be evidence of each of them in his life. Set your standards high, for to find and be married to such a man is one of life’s highest privileges. It is worth whatever wait, whatever cost.